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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26641651">Feel So Close</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/imamotherfuckingstarlord/pseuds/imamotherfuckingstarlord'>imamotherfuckingstarlord</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>MCU, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bucky - Freeform, Civil War (Marvel), F/M, Falling In Love, Pregnancy, Slow Burn, mcu - Freeform, steve - Freeform, winter solider - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:55:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,337</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26641651</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/imamotherfuckingstarlord/pseuds/imamotherfuckingstarlord</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve Rogers has a mission for you - help him find his old friend, Bucky.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bucky Barnes/Reader, bucky marvel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happens a little after CACW</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prologue: The Mission</p>
<p>You packed lightly, a single large backpack and a good durable jacket. Sitting on the edge of your bed, you stared down at the file in your hands - James Buchanan Barnes. It was a small file, one that Steve put together with the most recent photo he could find of his friend. After everything had happened with the ‘Winter Soldier’ and Hydra, you knew Steve wasn’t going to just let it go. He was going to find his friend and you volunteered to help, heeding the warning Natasha had given about him being dangerous.</p>
<p>Dangerous didn’t scare you much, it was the not knowing - that made you shiver and you could only imagine how Steve felt. Bucky was the only person Steve had growing up, he told you that much and the look in his eyes when he recalled losing him the first time, it was enough to make you want to help.</p>
<p>A soft knock interrupted your thoughts and you called out for whoever it was to enter. It was Steve, looking every bit ready for the hunt.</p>
<p>“Hey, just came to check on you.”</p>
<p>“You came to see if I’d back out,” you laughed and stood up, putting your backpack on. “I want to help, Steve. I will find him.”</p>
<p>“You don’t have to do this,” he asserted, making his way to you. “It’s asking a lot.”</p>
<p>“I’m your teammate and friend,” you reminded him. “I want to help; besides, I can’t wait to find him first before Sam.”</p>
<p>Steve laughed. “I’m glad Sam and you are making a game of this.”</p>
<p>“Hey, whatever gets the job done, right? Come on, you can give me a ride to the airport.”</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>Steve had received several leads and sightings of Bucky, but the path he sent you on had taken you across Europe and all its touristy places. Every city, large and small, not a single sight of Bucky and three weeks in, you were starting to think he really was a ghost.</p>
<p>You leaned against the cab window and looked down at the black and white surveillance photo of Bucky and sighed.</p>
<p>Where are you?</p>
<p>He looked so primitive in the photo, a bit lost, and lonely - something you could understand. Yes, being an Avenger had its perks, but sometimes things were lonely. You were a part of a team that the whole world knew, had an opinion on. Sometimes you wanted to walk away, find a small town to settle into normalcy, but here you were - searching for a phantom.</p>
<p>Your cell started to ring and you apologized in German to the cab driver, taking it from your jacket to see it was Steve. Feeling guilty for having nothing but no news for the man, you took a deep breath and answered in a cheery voice.</p>
<p>“Hallo, Freund!”</p>
<p>“I take it you’re in Germany, how’s it going?”</p>
<p>Looking out the window, you sighed. “It’s going, I’m about to drive into Heidelberg,” you informed him.</p>
<p>“You got a lead?”</p>
<p>“Not exactly,” you confessed, tapping the passenger window. “Just a hunch. His last sighting, if it was true, was in Darmstadt. So, I started going down on the map, I hit up all the surrounding cities, this place was next on the list.”</p>
<p>The other line remained quiet for a few seconds before Steve sighed. “Remember, you can always throw in the towel.”</p>
<p>“I can do a lot of things, Steve, but I’m not giving up just yet. Besides, I’m traveling all over Europe on someone else’s tab - this is a dream come true.”</p>
<p>Steve laughed just as the cab pulled to the small hotel you had booked for yourself for a few nights. “I’m here, Cap. I’m going to check in, look around the local community. Feel out the place and see if I find anything.”</p>
<p>“Sounds good.”</p>
<p>You thanked the driver and handed over payment for the ride from the train station, where you came in from Weinheim. “Hey, where are you two, anyway?”</p>
<p>“Scotland.”</p>
<p>Getting out of the cab, you walked toward the inn with your bag and gazed around the city - it was beautiful, romantic looking. “I’m jealous, but you should see where I am.”</p>
<p>“Have fun and thank you again,” Steve said.</p>
<p>The two of you exchanged goodbyes and you hung up - smiling to yourself, because the job of ghost hunter didn’t seem so bad suddenly.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Finding Bucky</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After checking in, you showered and googled the city you were in - it was home to the oldest university in Germany, so you decided to blend in with the college crowd with a pair of jeans and sweater. You went downstairs to the main lobby of the small inn and asked the woman at the front desk if she knew of a good place to eat - she said there was a small restaurant that was popular with the young people, a ten-minute walk away. You thanked her and instantly regretted not bringing a heavier coat, but stubbornness made you shrug it off.</p>
<p>It took about 15 minutes to get to the restaurant, because you were so busy gawking at the sights of the city, but once you found it you realized how hungry you were. You ordered whatever looked decent on the menu and opted to sit out on the small patio. It was chilly out, but the view was nice and you wanted to relax for a bit. Traveling was exhausting, but traveling alone? It was mentally draining at times, not having someone else to talk to, but that’s what you signed up for - there was no use complaining.</p>
<p>While you waited for the food, you sipped on the wine you ordered and started going through the data you collected on Bucky on your phone. It was all hearsay, even a crappy surveillance photo would have made the trip feel worthwhile, but nothing.  Leaning back into the patio chair, you placed the cell down and started people watching - a favorite pastime of yours.</p>
<p>You were tempted to call Steve, see how it was going on your end, but the food had arrived and the realization of how hungry you took over. So, you sat there, solo, eating quietly and reminding yourself you were an independent woman who traveled on her own. It was enough to combat the underlying loneliness while you ate.</p>
<p>Afterwards, you left a hefty tip and started down the small alleyway. There were plenty of people around, so you followed, with respectable distance, a group of students to a bar. It was a small hole in the wall - the same kind you find throughout Europe. Walking in, you beelined it to the bar and ordered a domestic beer. You sat in a corner booth and faded into the background, listening to the conversations and the flirtations between people buzzing around the place. The bar was lively and for a moment, it felt like one of the joints the team would go to in Brooklyn - everyone would be just having a good time, forgetting the day job for once and suddenly, as you sat there, you felt homesick.</p>
<p>Downing the rest of your beer, you got up and left the booth. You gave the bartender a nod and started toward the front door when someone bumped into you - the sound of glass was muffled over the noise of the bar.</p>
<p>An apology came in German from a man wearing a black baseball cap, he was already kneeled on the ground, picking up the pieces of the broken glasses. You quickly moved down beside him, offering to help.</p>
<p>“It was an accident,” you explained, immediately switching over to German and repeating what you had said.</p>
<p>“It’s okay,” he offered up in English, giving you the quickest glance as he gathered the mugs back into the black tub he had in his hands. “I didn’t you see, it’s busy.”</p>
<p>You placed a few shards of glass into the tub and said he’d probably need a broom to get the rest. “Not that I’m here to delegate how you do your job.”</p>
<p>He gave a quiet laugh and said it was alright, finally looking at you. “Mind standing here for a sec? I’ll get the broom.”</p>
<p>The entire room went silent, you couldn’t hear a thing as the man’s eyes met yours. It was like getting hit by a car going 80, you couldn’t breathe a word, just nodded. He gave you a curious glance before he walked away, moving toward the back of the bar. You stood there in the middle of the crowded bar, feeling like the luckiest person on the Earth.</p>
<p>Fumbling for your cell, you dialed Steve and cursed him when he took forever to pick up.</p>
<p>“Hey, we just got back from scouting - we came up short -”</p>
<p>“Steve,” you interrupted quietly, looking to where the man had disappeared, hoping to get another glance before you said another word. As if on cue, he stepped out of a small room, broom in hand. This time you noticed the long sleeve black shirt he was wearing and a black glove on his left hand. Then your eyes moved to his face from across the room, a face you had studied for weeks, hell, months.</p>
<p>“What’s going on?”</p>
<p>It was him.</p>
<p>Holy shit. You did it, you…</p>
<p>“I found him, Steve.” you exhaled with relief into the cell. “I found Bucky.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. James</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“He’s there?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I’m looking right at him,” you whispered, realizing Bucky was coming closer. “I have to go, he’s coming back.”</p>
<p>“From where? Nevermind, just keep him in your sights,” Steve commanded, his voice tight. “Don’t engage, you hear me? We don’t know what state he’s in. Sam and I will try to catch a flight tonight.”</p>
<p>“I have to go,” you urged. Not waiting for Steve to respond, you hung up and gave Bucky a small smile as he approached you.</p>
<p>“Thanks for waiting.”</p>
<p>“No problem,” you shrugged, trying your best to not falter.</p>
<p>It was him! It was Bucky!</p>
<p>You had traveled for weeks looking for him and now he was right in front of you - admittedly, more handsome than you expected. It almost felt like meeting an online date for the first time - was he gonna look like his picture? Was it going to be like you expected?</p>
<p>The stories Steve had told you about his long lost friend - his brother. Bucky Barnes, had created an illusion of sorts and all you wanted to do was find out if it all was true. Yet, Steve was correct in his warning, you didn’t know what state Bucky was in. While you weren’t there when everything went down with SHIELD being taken over by Hydra and the Winter Soldier appearing, you heard the stories, read the reports. The Winter Soldier had been a cold machine for Hydra and what was in front of you now, was the remains of that machine.</p>
<p>Bucky knelt down and started sweeping the glass into the dustpan, you watched awkwardly trying to figure the next step.</p>
<p>Right, what Steve said.</p>
<p>Taking a deep breath, you glanced down at Bucky. “I better get going, it’s my first night here and I don’t think I remember the way back to the inn.”</p>
<p>“It’s getting dark out,” he spoke quietly as he stood up, dustpan in hand. “I can walk you if you’d like?”</p>
<p>“Oh, that’s not necessary. I’m from New York,” you said, hoping to gain some sort of reaction from him. “I can handle myself.”</p>
<p>“I’m sure you can,” he replied, not a hint of familiarity in his voice. “But you’re a tourist, my shift is done. I can walk you.”</p>
<p>“If you insist,” you gave a weak smile and waited as he walked around the bar, he said something to the bartender who grinned and patted his shoulder. Bucky gave him a glare as he grabbed a black jacket off the back counter and made his way to you, asking if you were ready.</p>
<p>The two of you left the bar and you shivered, regretting not going back for a jacket when you left the inn.</p>
<p>“Here,” he said quietly, tugging off his jacket. “Take it.”</p>
<p>“I’ll be fine,” you insisted, but Bucky stopped in his tracks and held it out again. Deciding Bucky couldn’t be as bad as the stories, you thanked him and quickly put on the jacket - feeling so much warmer within seconds. “You won’t be cold?”</p>
<p>He shrugged, motioning for you to turn at the corner. “I’m use to it already.”</p>
<p>“Are you originally from here?”</p>
<p>You question didn’t faze Bucky, who said no, but didn’t elaborate. You figured not to push, like Steve said, so you dropped it and asked if he knew of any good places to eat breakfast.</p>
<p>“Yeah, you’re at the Rosemary, right?”</p>
<p>“How’d ya know?”</p>
<p>Bucky looked a bit embarrassed, but he nodded toward the inn that came into the view from down the street. “It’s the only inn around here, everything else is a hotel.”</p>
<p>“Right,” you replied with a soft smile.</p>
<p>You wanted Rogers here so badly, wanted to tell Buck it was okay - that you all were going to help him, but it was too soon. Stopping in front of a bookstore, you thanked him and said you’d got the rest of the way. “I’m sure I can manage a block, thank you again. I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”</p>
<p>Maybe it was pushing too much, but you had to know what name he would give. Would it be Bucky? Or a completely different name?</p>
<p>He stilled for a moment, eyes glancing around before he smiled softly. “James. The name’s James.”</p>
<p>“Well, James,” you offered up a hand and grinned. “Thank you for showing this American tourist back to her inn. I appreciated.”</p>
<p>He held out his gloveless hand and took yours, sending a wave of warmth through your body. The two of you retreated your hands and Bucky gave you a small smile. “You’re welcome, have a nice night.”</p>
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